Some Things Stay With Us Forever

Some things have a way with staying with us forever. Be it the smell coming from your grandmother's kitchen or a lesson learned, some things have a penchant for lingering well past the point of expiration.

My mind is wandering tonight. Two hours ago I was fighting to stay awake so I could watch It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia. Talk about brain rot. lol This show keeps me home from the gym on Thursday's because I have a soft spot for mindless television. It doesn't require much thought and when I'm paying attention, I can usually get a good chuckle or three in within a short period of time. I need those chuckles. Life has been bitter, sweet, and as of late...bittersweet.

For years I was on the receiving end of criticism. Sometimes I stood up for myself, while other times I just let the criticisms build up until I was confident I was done. Some people, I've learned, are worthy of second, third, and even tenth chances to prove themselves worthy of my company. Others, well...not so much.

The other day, as I was cleaning my room, I ran across a card I had long forgotten about. It was completely black with the head of a tiger embossed on it. On the inside was a handwriting I was long familiar with. It belonged to my high school best friend. She was apologizing for the way she'd been treating me, but for the life of me I can't remember what she was apologizing for because mistreatment and/or misunderstandings were recurring themes in our friendship. We would go months, even years without talking. Eventually, as is the case now, I would end up missing her. By now I would have called only for me to, in due time, to remember why we didn't click. We were on seperate journeys. Most friendships have an arrival and departure date, but for some reason, our friendship had many layovers that lasted either a few months or years.

One day, I finally had my feel of things. I was done. And though I could have handled things a little better than I had, I had reached my breaking point. I had reached a point of no return. I had reached the point in our relationship that was marked final destination.

I still love her dearly. I miss the good times we had together, but I definitely learned from the bad. The loss of that friendship marked the beginning of my end. That was three years ago and I am finally understanding just how pivotal that moment was in my life. I found my first little piece of peace and I was right along. Some of us are only meant to be together for a short while, while others will be with us longer. Our friendship had run its course. It had to be stopped, but there will never be any love lost on that end because we shared so many things together.

That letter made me realize that some things really do stay with us forever. That was a lesson learned that I will be able to share with my girls. Though I purged that friendship, I am finding it easier to know that purging has it's own set of benefits. I am stronger. I am more in tune with my spirit and I am free to choose my own path to ensure that I arrive at the destination of my choice.